Social media profiling

We all do it. Even if subconsciously. Likes, follows and comments can tell a lot about an individual. Even the absence of interaction says something about a person.

Surely you’ve thought about it before. It happens when we put our contacts circle into categories.

  • “the Watchers”, they’re nosy, watch without engaging (you can also refer to them as “The Judgy”;
  • “the Teasers”, they only react, don’t comment;
  • “the Smarty Pants”, who like to put stir the pot, only comment once and then watch the argument escalate;
  • “the Annoyers”, they love to argue until they’re blue in the face to get nowhere;
  • “the Moaners”, they moan about everything, but don’t offer any constructive criticism;
  • “the Solvers” (or “FTFs, First-Time-Fix, as we class the ideal Customer Support”), they have a solution for anything;
  • “the Braggers”, who only share their big spendings, even if that only happens once a year;
  • “the Oversharers”…

The list can vary and could be shorter or longer. Surely you have similar ones, in your mind, and you are classing them as you scroll over posts. And many of these will also, around about Christmas, follow under another four categories: “To keep”, “Unfollow imminent”, “Unfollow” and “Unfriend”. Every time I go over it I find myself thinking: “Why do I till have someone I worked with 15 years ago in my circle? We don’t even interact. For all I know, they could have passed…” I’ll leave soaking a link with someone that gives a post or a comment a “like” 78 weeks since it was posted, if being disconnected from social media it’s their character trait. I mean, I do that. I think that’s a Gen X trait, to just not care about what other people think.

As a result, my contacts list has become half its size in the last decade. To be honest, interacting with like-minded people can be fun, and you don’t really have to know them, but belonging to the same generation can be the most common denominator.

Menopausal Monday #11

#rantalert

You know that crescendo rage you feel building up when someone talks to you like you have a learning disability? I am an absolute advocate for people to be addressed politely but some people do it in such a way it’s offensive (if anyone is totally entitled to feel offended is menopausal women). There’s being polite and there’s being condescending. And we all know this is a current trend, it’s not a targeted behaviour.

Another Monday rant

We built entire civilizations, created world order, yet we are no longer allowed to dream big or have high knowledge ambitions. We live in a twisted world, where children are rewarded for doing the bare minimum, what has always been commonly accepted as a society expectation. The new generations are being given (chasing even) the tools not to achieve, to find shortcuts to get from A to B without the joy of the journey. They are experts in how to not be happy, how to not feel fulfilled.

But women of all statistic groups are the ones mostly targeted. For being a woman, not saying that we can’t do something, but implicitly tipping that you might need a cheat technique to achieve it like a man.

For being single, when we’re feeling lonely, being told by our married friends that we don’t really want a partner or children, because it’s all too much, and our freedom will be over.

For being a mother, funnily enough, by other mothers (we can be real bitches to each other), telling us we’re doing great, whilst politely offering their suggestion of the way they REALLY feel is the right way to parent.

The truth is in close relationships, people we love do it, even without noticing, finishing my sentences, correcting me, not repeating something I didn’t catch the first time.

We’re demeaned by co-workers, who believe a position is synonym of intelligence and superiority, when we could do their job with our eyes closed, but choose not take that challenge, because money does not pay for integrity nor peace of mind.

I hate condescendence and belittling people. It makes me feel small and incapable. I’d rather be told I’m rubbish but being given the opportunity to improve or gain skill to be good at something than to accept and dwell in the feel of failure. How can someone be told it’s ok to be a failure and not do something about it? And not to be offered options. To me it feels like the person patting my back is even more useless than me.

I’m so glad I was born when I was born. Given the chance, I would always choose to be born earlier, not later. I wouldn’t want to be born into a time where opportunities to grow are being restricted by society, where generations are being dumbed down by technology, where lazyness is rewarded for the comfort of the few. There’s only one word for it: SHEEPLE 😟 Now, this is a topic for another category…

The feeling of being proven right

There are a lot of pleasant feelings a human being can have but being proven right must be one of the most fulfilling ones.

Less is more in 99% of the cases

If you follow this and the other one of my posts you probably remember that I recommended a piece of sensible reading (of course, sensible, I don’t share anything else), which was the Happiful eZine, an expertly curated off and online publication on mental wellbeing.

On their Issue 105 (P38-39), there is an article on “How to spot mental health misinformation online”, by an integrative counsellor named Georgina Sturmer. With so much “fake news” and AI-generated content it may be hard to tell truth from fake, as some can be so well worded it will convince you it could only have been written by an expert. And it wasn’t. Georgina shares some of the actions we can take to verify the information being shared. Really useful.

This also refers me back to of all the conversations I had with my children (and still have with my youngest). They live what they watch. It is true that they become dependent of that daily dopamine dose and believe most things they watch. We have to constantly keep reminding him that the influencer/YouTubers he follows is no expert, they wing it, taking advantage of him and others like him, that the influencer profits from their naivety.

But I get it, it’s hard for a teenager to admit that they’re wrong and that they’re being cheated by their idols and favourite follows. It probably feels like a betrayal. I know that if I continue drilling that truth into thhem, they’ll eventually come to their senses and start seeing it for what it is. It is in effect a generational clash.

Not everything we see on social media channels is fake. Everybody knows it is impossible to ignore it or to leave without it. But the same as with everything, scepticism and moderation is key. It is important to keep our lines of thinking, to preserve our unique identity and not just follow because others do.

Menopausal Monday #10

Self Talk

It’s Monday

Know that familiar feeling at the end of every weekend? That disheartening feeling that comes when something good is over? That’s another weekend flew past. It always feels like we didn’t get enough time… By the time we start to relax, it’s already Sunday.

And let’s agree, Mondays are probably the most antisocial week day there is! (Unless we’re on holiday, where Monday can get easily be mistaken for a weekend 😂) Who doesn’t dread Mondays put their hands up ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️.

It was the Strawbear Festival in Whittlesey last weekend. Gotta say, it didn’t feel as popular as last year. And the Strawbear didn’t have the traditional vibe. Once the standing Strawbear steps down, we expected him to be replaced by someone with similar posture. But hey, tradition is not what it used to be anymore. Still good healthy fun to watch.

Turns out I’m Yellow

Ever heard about DISC? I did my first DISC assessment (in 20 years of employment) at the end of last year. I had never had one (that I remember). I found it really useful to understand my working behaviour. Based on the assessment, I am predominantly yellow, followed by blue, then green, then red. I must admit the results don’t come as a surprise.

D = Dominance, I = Influence, S= Steadiness and C= Consciousness

Yellow reflects my bubbly characteristics alongside my geeky blue side. Green is the next in line (if my effort is not bringing up clear and relatively quick results, I’ll just keep my head down, sticking to the essentials. And red… What can I say? I was never bossy; my style is fully collaborative.

And the most reassuring fact is that I am true to myself, no matter what setting I’m in. Analysing our behaviour can actually be quite useful in providing us with pointers on what levels to adjust to make my work approach more productive and pleasurable, once other people understand theirs and ours.

Have you done one yet?

Two weeks in

All looking good in terms of res’s so far. Plenty of water intake, well-planned healthy eating and no alcohol consumption. Our daily night walks are only spot-stopping due to the odd joint ache or cold and flu symptoms. Age is ruthlessly unapologetic. It will only give back as much as you put in. Chamomile tea is currently all it takes for me to snooze away…

I can already tell the difference in how I feel, mood-wise, in my body and ease of movement. It’s amazing how just two weeks of a few little changes make such a difference.

Missing my little girl, though… Always thinking of what she might be doing, if she’s feeling ok, if she’s happier, if she’s making progress with her life. However, I can’t micro-manage as I tend to, not at this distance. I did make a point in giving her space to find herself. Kudos to me 💪

I must say I do like the hybrid work format. I like that it forces me out of the house. I also like that it is only two days, as I get soooo much done on the other three! I am grateful for the balance.

The days are feeling longer, and we can already see the light at the end of each day. Roll on Spring. 🌻🌸🌹🌼

Menopausal Monday #9

Self Talk

Cold can be harsh

Winter has definitely arrived now. It has even snowed, can you believe it? And it certainly has an effect on our joints. Some of us appear to predict it before it arrives, or maybe it is a housewife’s tale. Personally, I don’t think I do.

I have never felt it as bad as this Winter. It’s just one more box ticked off on my menopause symptoms, I guess. My back and knee joints are surely feeling the 48 years of wear and tear. I don’t even need gravity to make it hurt; the ache is there just by bending.

But it takes more than a few aches to put me off life and my good mood. Back at my Bel’s programme, I’m gathering ammunition to fight the lot (trust me, it works).

Beware, I’m not an Affiliate. No commission is earned from your clicking on that link. I don’t affiliate; my promotion is purely based on my experience. It works so well for me, I wish to share it with all the other women.

I’m adding a collagen supplement to the game, as I refuse to give up on my daily exercises because of my knees (especially the spicy kind… 😜). So, at this point, I have reached a total of 13 supplements across six different products. I know it sounds and looks over the top, but these supplements are complementing my diet and helping to suppress the decrease in amino acid and hormone production, allowing me to function and feel well.

Screw blue January

Loving the new background imagery on our laptops. So colourfully warming 🥰 We tend to underestimate the suggestive motivation to work.


Weekends, holidays and retirement, that’s what we work for, what we look forward to (unless you have a highly paid fun creative job, of course… 😝).

For those billions of us that don’t, we still have to conform to 28, 30 annual leave days a year, as opposite to two months over the academic year, where children spend most of their days stuck in their bedrooms playing video games. I say we swap 😂

Looking forward to our first little trip of the year, to Kessingland (I ❤️ Norfolk) for a very Brit type holiday… 😏

#holidays🌴 #workhardplayhard💪 #ilovenorfolk #britholiday

Menopausal Monday #8

Self Talk

There’s no such thing.

The Christmas tree is now down, meaning this festive season is officially over. But it’s going to take more than the absence of twinkling bright lights to drag me into a blue state. There’s a restlessness left in me that’s pushing me to be optimistic, in spite of all the ongoing bad news on the current world affairs.

It’s scary to think that we may be assisting to the return to inpune imperialistic regimens, lead by major global powers who could end us all in a phone tap. Piggy-backing on that perspective, life can only get better, and as such, we better start bloody living it.

This doesn’t mean that we now give ourselves permission to act recklessly, or irresponsibly. Instead, it means that we (I) need to start living our lives with more purpose: MORE of what makes us happy, LESS of what gives us grief.