I say to myself often. When I get halfway through the day and feel like I’ve been scraping but got nothing done, when none of my efforts are being seen (or it looks as if people are purposefully ignoring me).
The whole world is against me. All the traffic lights are red, the work is stressful and boring, and everyone is rude.
I know it’s my hormones, but my brain cannot process what’s going on in my body. There is no reasonable explanation. And because I cannot find an answer, I cannot, as a result, find a solution for the problem. Hence why I cannot be bothered.
If I cannot find the solution, then just leave me be. Depending on the time of day, I can be found having a strong cup of coffee or a glass of red, having a lie down on the settee, watching Parenthood (love that show!) or a Place in the Sun (and dreaming about my retirement). What else is there to do?
There are perks. I never liked overlooking windows in my back garden. My idea of sharing on social platforms was always to keep connected with family and people I already knew. Yes, admittedly, there is some degree of nosiness, but in a healthy way, at least from my part.
Nosy neighbours
Several years followed with a lot of “unfriending” and “unfollowing”, simply because a lot of the people being added over the years were simple acquaintances, and there were some parts of my private life I didn’t really want to be sharing. With others, I didn’t feel resonated with me, they were not engaging or simply sharing boring posts.
I have already been considering removing myself from all these platforms, because they’re no longer social. They turned into commercial platforms, with flavourless AI content. The only reason I am still on them is purely because they keep me informed (despite all the fact-checking and filtering I have to do) to ensure the content is indeed curated to suit my interests. I still think there is a lot to be done around tailoring this, where we can keep influencers and other rubbish posts filtered out. There is a lot of social media spamming currently going on. It is just exhausting…
This opinion is being shared as a result of an article I came across, which I found. I guess my devices are already adjusting my feed settings 😂 Very relevant. Enjoy.
These last five years have been an absolute rollercoaster. Dropping our daughter off at her Uni accommodation was as exhausting as emotional. Living and studying through COVID, amidst a generation that uses social media to intimidate and manipulate others without mercy, did not make our task any easier, as we tried to hold them afloat without swallowing the odd gulp of water. Often, pulling us down with her… These are not the easiest times to raise children. I salute those parents who are brave enough to make that decision.
This is her time
This is it. My baby girl is no longer a girl; she’s a young woman. She’s living on her own, doing most of the adult stuff. Applying all her learning to her single living requires organisation and consistency. “Routine is crucial”, I tell her. “Take whatever help is available to help you: calendars, reminders, alarms, etc. Take anything that can prompt you to act and help you keep on track. Don’t take time for granted.”
The anxiety isn’t over, though…
A new stage of anxiety has set in (understandably) related to this overwhelming life-changing phase. Her racing thoughts are now around the fear of living alone, the fear of not meeting the academic expectations, the fear of not getting a job, and the fear of not finding friends who identify with her values and beliefs.
That’s a lot to bear in mind when all these things are relatively simple. However, the current generation tends to overthink and overcomplicate things. In the good old days, we would just shake it off and get on with it. No time (nor patience) to overthink. We just wanted to live it.
It may take a while until she settles. She’s not used to a big, busy city and to not have us there at an arm’s reach whenever she needs us. It’s something that will take time to sink in, for sure, given her scarce social experiences.
We will be there for her, no matter what
Even though there is a geographical distance, and that we disagree with most of the dystopian ways they see the world, we are still her family and will be here for whatever (reasonable) needs she has.
Yes, she will still need to bear with our advice, no matter how often she repeats “I know”, no matter how pestering she finds us. Repetition works best (and not just at the gym), I trust it will get to a point where she’ll be breezing through and we won’t need to advise her unless we are required. And that, my friends, is a whole other level of parenting. I think it’s called retiring… 😂
Last week 16 people lost their lives in one (if not the most iconic) Lisbon trams. We should see this as a warning to the tourism over-crowded countries.
Elevador da Glória
Something must be done. And I’m not referring only to these beast old vehicles’ regular maintenance. I’m talking about the excessive tourism that’s gone out of hand, pushed by pure greed. Sacrificing the locals’ living standard (which was already not that high before), by pushing the property selling value way above their worth,
Why not set a figure restriction? Surely tourism would become more sustainable if there was a cap on the numbers?
This article talks about the strain tourism puts on countries that welcome visitors.
I am not looking for clicks or followers writing about this topic (unless what I write entertains your thinking). As many of us do, I find writing therapeutic; it helps me make sense of the world around me. And I’m sorry, as much as I’d like to keep up with new ways of reasoning, I found no convincing view for this trend. I just cannot come to terms with how Millennials + have developed into a bubble-wrapped generation. Clearly, society has devolved, not evolved.
All that pain and hardship that used to be seen as part of growth is now seen as the root cause of all sorts of mental health problems. And the normal geekiness and introvertedness are now labelled neurodiversity traits.
In my opinion, society (us) is crippling the new generations of their natural talents and from acquiring important life-coping skills and mechanisms, which cannot otherwise be learnt. And no, this cannot be learned with a YouTube or TikTok video. It’s gotta be experienced.
For the first time my son got absolutely shit-faced. Barely a teenager. That’s why he was asking if I was working from home today… Went through our bar and picked the heaviest spirit available.
The crime weapon
Found at St. Mary’s church back yard, nearly completely out of it. He could barely talk, let along sit up… A spectacle Tik Tok worthy I’m sure. Surrounded by girls…? I cannot even comprehend this equation… 😂
We’ve all been there (getting through it or supporting someone through it), so I cannot judge him. It’s his own learning curve 🥰
Being able to see through people’s intentions and quickly picking up on chemistry, vibes, and cues is a privilege mostly earned with age and experience. A rare few may be naturally gifted to identify red flags. However, in an increasingly virtual world, these cues may be harder to pick up, especially for those who are still young.
Adding a hybrid setting to the experience helps because you get both the virtual cues and the body language when working in the office, which supports your conclusions. I have always had a passion for human psychology and love to try to understand the reasons why people act in certain ways.
Whilst some people will hold onto the belief that what you don’t know cannot hurt you, I like the knowledge. Although there are theories that defend that understanding may lead to resonating, I think that will greatly depend on how strong someone’s principles and values are.
I feel understanding human behaviour could help me deal with people daily. The premise that drives people’s actions is often quite basic and simple, yet the damage could equally be inversely proportional.
Make use of a Milennial word, cringing is probably the best definition for dealing with people with whom I don’t click with. I know you know what I mean. There are currently a few people in my working life who make my stomach churn. What makes it churn? Dishonesty, hypocrisy, opportunism, and laziness.
They make our daily interactions intoxicating, they undermine our efforts to think positively, and they drain any resourcefulness we can possibly have. And when this type of people is located at two (sometimes three) levels of hierarchy, even worse. This totally throws my ethical trust in my employer in front of a bus.
The ability to recognise these people and step as far away as possible is a skill you gain over time, with experience. It’s not always easy, especially when your scope of work overlaps. How do we manage that without allowing it to completely ruin our day? It’s not an easy task, although simple. I find that what works for me is a trust in my gut (that my feelings will eventually be proven right, even though I may not have the front seat view) and a change in perception (that that person has no real impact on your life, in the grand scheme of things).
They call it “working smart, not hard”. Not sure that it is true. I’m not very supportive of many of the ways they consider “smart”. One thing is making use of the available resources to save time and money, the other is jumping over red tape or completely ignoring the rules to reach goals, only to find that one very important step was missed and cannot be retrieved. This is what the new generation is going for, in games they buy mods to jump over levels or checkpoints, at work they are totally unreliable as part of a team (they’re lazy and are often sick) or rather are simply in for their personal gain. Maybe they have it right and I’m wrong. Clearly, employment (stability) is a thing of the past. Job-hopping is way more fun.
As an Gen X female I question these generations’ values. How can companies hire someone that they cannot deem accountable on in the medium long term? I guess with AI, human resources are getting more and more disposable.
Online, they use “Likes” to their advantage, working their way up or grooming newcomers to do their bidding. This is today’s working world. But they do it casually too, as if they have no second intentions. Charity work, fundraising… The subtleties are there if you only pay attention.
However, dealing with these behaviours over time can wear us off. For me, at this age, it’s all about priorities as a means to reach my self-preservation end. We can only endure so much, and that capacity will be different for each individual, but the means definitely justify the end, as long as my well-being is not immediately at stake. I think I have been pretty clear in the recent past that I do not take bullying or abuse of authority well (actually, really proud of having stood up for myself there 🥰.)
Age has its benefits, for sure. And I’m glad it’s totally underrated. Nobody will see us coming…
I’m currently going through a phase where I am going through my daily motions as if on auto-pilot.
For a while now I feel like I’m only acting on prompts, only when my direct intervention is required. I no longer act by desire, by my own will. It’s like I’ve accomplished whatever I was meant to accomplish in my life. Yet I feel like I have achieved nothing.
Moving with the seasons
The current wellbeing trends encourage us to be grateful for our little wins. I’m trying. I’ve got a reasonably paid job, a loving family, two beautiful children, a wonderful partner, a sweet dog and plans for retirement are underway.
But there’s something missing. Something I seem to have lost along the way and can’t seem to get it back, no matter what I do.
Some more mystical theories defend that we should go with with the Universal flow, that what’s meant to be will be, and that the fact that we don’t have defined objectives doesn’t mean there aren’t any already pre-designed, that we may be resting from something we went through in a past lifenor preparing for what’s coming in the next. I kinda like that thought. It removes the feeling of guilt for the lack of ambition, I guess…
It’s misleading and overrated. We’re all being lead to think passive income is an easy way to an awful six-figures of free loading cash.
Came across an article that sums it up nicely yesterday. It’s more trouble than it’s worth. I’d rather start a business the good old way and actually see things happening than blindly pay someone to do the “leg work” for me.
I’ve got a few ideas. I am hoping our retirement doesn’t mean we’ll become hermits or useless. I really don’t see myself always at a loose end. I want to enjoy my retirement free time, but also feel busy.
Where the younger generation is looking for a lazy life, we’re looking for a full and somewhat busy (AND social) end of life. I wouldn’t want to get stuck working solely remotely, as convenient as that may sound. I can see myself running a small shop or a rural setting Zen retreat of a sort…
The new generations are now born into that mentality, becoming very reserved and geeky. Social may soon be scarce… How boring that all sounds 😝
I think I’d be a great host. Well, a girl can dream…
Being of Portuguese origin, everyone expects me to be a good cook, but I tell you I dread to cook. I do it from scratch because I like to know what I’m eating, and I like me and my family to eat healthy, same as my mum.
It’s been working. So far no medical conditions, no worse health issues than COVID. Especially now, on my menopause. Check!
Sometimes I feel inspired. Like today. (But I only get to be inspired on a weekend. Week days are too busy for that, I can’t just follow my creative flows…)
Salmon pasta salad is quite simple but soooo tasty! Staples: pasta, bell peppers, white onion, courgette, tomatoes, black olives and feta cheese. And of course, the salmon. It ticks all my needs boxes 😋
The spices you add are totally up to your taste buds. I tend to keep any natural juices As I added extra virgin olive oil (salt and pepper) to roast the vegies, all I had to add was balsamic vinegar.
Nostalgic Mumma 